The most annoying part of this trip, by far, is all the questions I get about Bottle Boy. I carry him in a big black bag that I wheel around. Every other person I pass asks me something – the problem is that I don’t speak French so I have no way to respond to them.
I learned the French word for mascot, which conveniently is “mascot”, but when I respond to their questions by saying “mascot” it just invites more questions. Then, when I don’t respond I come off looking like a jerk.
So, after some trial and error I’ve come up with a workable solution. When anyone asks me about the bottle I just say something totally unintelligible but that sounds French. They get very confused and think I misspoke, but by the time they realize it, I’m gone. It’s also a ton of fun to say things in a crazy French accent that arent’ actually French but sound like they should be.
Here are some of the responses I’ve used when people ask me what is in the costume:
“D’Giorno!” – yes, the name of the frozen pizza. It sounds great with a dramatic French accent. Plus it cracks me up that I am telling people that I am carrying around a bunch of frozen pizzas and they have no idea what I am talking about)
Bobali!! – not as good as D’Giorno, but it continues with my pizza theme.
Vidal Sasson! – try it with a French accent, it sounds great!
Barbizon! – yes the modeling school.
McFlurry! – continuing with the McDonalds theme. For some reason anything with a “Mc” before it sounds great.
Boisons! – this is actually the French word for “beverage” but I say it with a thick Midwestern accent so it sounds totally unintelligible.
I could go on for a while here, but I’m sure you are getting the point. Yes, we have A LOT of time on our hands!
Back to the stage. It was a flat day today so we parked along the only cat 3 climb. I heard I got on for a split second, which was nice. We also ran into a bunch of British guys, one of whom was pretty interested in being Bottle Boy next year. That would be great – 3 years is plenty for me and having someone relatively local would save a lot on flights and shipping costs.